The T word

The first time I did therapy afterwards I felt jittery, the second time I had a sense of calm after. Today was the third and afterward I felt raw like a wound had been ripped open and I was in pain. Today I was again told that every reason I decided to go to therapy is a direct symptom of childhood trauma. This is only my 3rd session and that word continuously pops up.  I don’t have a lot of childhood memory before the age of 10 but those that I do have are not the greatest. So I can’t tell you what happened in my childhood that was so traumatic. And here’s what gets me is that if there’s something that traumatic; why wasn’t this talked about? Why when I was violently angry to the point of having to be restrained was it not explained to me why I was reacting like this? Why was it that every time I asked why I was the way that I was, everyone said they had no idea that I was just born that way. You all stood and agreed to forever hold this lie. Because this is coming to light, I’m having to re-evaluate how I feel about people that I think hung the moon? 

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